Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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