Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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