He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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