did you get engaged???
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
