Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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