Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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