Well apparently he's into motor boating.
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
