Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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