You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
i've created a new STD.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
