And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Never joke about your clitoris.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
