nut hugger
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
