We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
