I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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