Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
