I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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