and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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