gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
