Betty ford says i'm here all night
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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