so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize