How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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