Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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