Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
