I showed him my bush... on skype.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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