can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
