omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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