yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
