There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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