fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Text me some of your sweat
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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