Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
