My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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