Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
