One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
