just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My vagina is officially offended.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
