Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
