I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
