Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
