I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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