Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
