South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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