"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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