so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
