I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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