we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I need to align my fucking chakras
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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