I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
