so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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