we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
