You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
