I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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