Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
There r osticjed everywhere
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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