It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
