I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize